What to do when you’re feeling overwhelmed by kids’ noise!

Does your child sometimes make NOISE that drives you CRAZY? Perhaps it’s singing the same song over and over … maybe the latest ear worm (Baby Shark anyone?) Repeating a favourite meme, or scene from a movie? Blowing a toy trumpet, or just making random NOISE! I’ve got to admit that I sometimes find these … Continue reading What to do when you’re feeling overwhelmed by kids’ noise!

How can we help when kids “zone out”?

I wonder if your child sucks their thumb, bites their nails, picks their skin or does some other repetitive behaviour? These are behaviours that kids (and adults) sometimes (unconsciously) use to manage the level of sympathetic activation or stress in their bodies when it gets too much. You might notice that at the same time, … Continue reading How can we help when kids “zone out”?

Polyvagal theory and the autonomic states: Safe & Social, Fight or Flight, Shut Down

I find it fascinating learning more about the autonomic nervous system and how the state of it is unconsciously expressed through our face, body and voice. Did you know that, according to Stephen Porge’s Polyvagal theory, the human autonomic (automatic) nervous system has 3 branches that have evolved over time in animals: ➡️ Ventral (Front) Vagal … Continue reading Polyvagal theory and the autonomic states: Safe & Social, Fight or Flight, Shut Down

My child isn’t giving me a hard time. My child is having a hard time.

Sometimes, when my son’s behaviour is going off track, I find it helpful to remind myself that he isn’t intentionally giving me a hard time - he’s having a hard time himself. I particularly need this reminder when I’m feeling low on resources (e.g. I’m tired, sick, stressed, or just needing a break), and when … Continue reading My child isn’t giving me a hard time. My child is having a hard time.

My top 11 hacks for falling back in love with your child

Have you ever had the experience, when you’re going through a tough time with one of your kids, of finding it hard to connect with a real sense of warmth for them? I have! Being in a loving state helps us to respond to our child with kindness, empathy and support, calming whatever chaos might … Continue reading My top 11 hacks for falling back in love with your child

Addressing off track behaviour by filling kids’ emotional cups – The “Love Cream” game

When kids’ behaviour becomes unenjoyable - they might be whinging, whining, demanding or making irritating noises, or they might be doing things they know you don't want them to do, or not doing things they know you would like them to do - it can often be a sign that their EMOTIONAL CUP is feeing … Continue reading Addressing off track behaviour by filling kids’ emotional cups – The “Love Cream” game

Responding playfully to being told to “Shut up!”: The ventriloquist game!

Does your child ever tell you to “shut up!”? Mine does. It doesn't happen often. But every now and then, when he’s upset, it will come out of his mouth. It’s a sign that he has some big feelings; he isn’t feeling heard, or he can't bear to hear what I’m trying to say (which … Continue reading Responding playfully to being told to “Shut up!”: The ventriloquist game!

Pillow games for responding playfully to our child’s aggression

I love pillows as props for responding playfully when my child feels like hitting or kicking! When kids are hitting or kicking, they are usually in a defensive state of fight-or-flight, which means they have lots of adrenaline pumping through their body, giving their muscles a surge of energy. Pillows offer the possibility of so … Continue reading Pillow games for responding playfully to our child’s aggression