Responding playfully to being told to “Shut up!”: The ventriloquist game!

Does your child ever tell you to “shut up!”? Mine does. It doesn't happen often. But every now and then, when he’s upset, it will come out of his mouth. It’s a sign that he has some big feelings; he isn’t feeling heard, or he can't bear to hear what I’m trying to say (which … Continue reading Responding playfully to being told to “Shut up!”: The ventriloquist game!

Responding playfully to kids’ aggressive urges with faux fighting

Can you sometimes see your child's aggression coming, but just don’t really know how to respond to stop it? Deep breathing might help to calm a child, but it can be pretty hard to encourage them to do it once a fight-or-flight response has been triggered! And resorting to yelling, threatening "consequences", or “time out” … Continue reading Responding playfully to kids’ aggressive urges with faux fighting

Pillow games for responding playfully to our child’s aggression

I love pillows as props for responding playfully when my child feels like hitting or kicking! When kids are hitting or kicking, they are usually in a defensive state of fight-or-flight, which means they have lots of adrenaline pumping through their body, giving their muscles a surge of energy. Pillows offer the possibility of so … Continue reading Pillow games for responding playfully to our child’s aggression

Kids’ aggression, responding playfully, and the challenge for parents

Putting together my own observations and experiences, and what I know about the nervous system, I’d like to outline my understanding of what is going on when children lash out, how responding playfully can help, and why it can be so challenging for parents. WHY DO KIDS LASH OUT?  When kids are lashing out, their nervous … Continue reading Kids’ aggression, responding playfully, and the challenge for parents

Setting limits playfully – The “chase and can’t catch” game

So last night my boy was bouncing a bit too vigorously on the sofa to the point that I thought he might damage the structure of the sofa. 🌼 From close by in the kitchen, I said to him in a silly voice, “I feel you are jumping too vigorously on the sofa!” (playful connection). 🌼 I … Continue reading Setting limits playfully – The “chase and can’t catch” game

What “The Book with No Pictures” can teach you about power reversal play!

Have you heard of power reversal play? When instead of being the bigger, stronger, wiser one, as we often appear to be, we play the part of the less competent one? The bumbling fool, even? Kids are so often the smaller and weaker ones. They are learning so much everyday, often not knowing how to … Continue reading What “The Book with No Pictures” can teach you about power reversal play!

Whatever you do, don’t say the ‘W’ word!

My little family has had an amazing week at home over this holiday season, possibly the most enjoyable we’ve ever had. We are now preparing for my husband to return to work tomorrow, and I think we all have a our own feelings about that, including feelings of disappointment, sadness, irritation, apprehension, frustration and powerlessness. … Continue reading Whatever you do, don’t say the ‘W’ word!