We’ve asked our child TO DO something (e.g. tidy up), or NOT TO DO something (e.g. not throw food on the floor), and they seemingly ignore us or wilfully defy us. Why? As I mentioned in my last post, we might have judgements come up in these situations, that we feel "explain" our child's behaviour … Continue reading What is the real reason behind kids’ lack of cooperation – and how to support them to cooperate more!
Can you sometimes see your child's aggression coming, but just don’t really know how to respond to stop it? Deep breathing might help to calm a child, but it can be pretty hard to encourage them to do it once a fight-or-flight response has been triggered! And resorting to yelling, threatening "consequences", or “time out” … Continue reading Responding playfully to kids’ aggressive urges with faux fighting
I came across this little quote right at the end of an article by Laura Markham and it immediately jumped out at me. It is so succinctly put, and it reminded me that sometimes we can get so caught up in techniques, in “What should I say or do in this situation?”, that we forget … Continue reading Children pick up on our feelings and intentions
After my 5 year old son discovered Minecraft eight months ago, screen time became very challenging. At one stage, we were having daily battles over screen time ending, with me setting a Loving Limit (something like, "I understand you really want to keep playing/watching, and it's time to finish now"), and him responding with hitting … Continue reading How reflecting on power helped with screen time struggles
When my son was 5, we started to experience some hitting and kicking from him when he had big feelings. Pure empathic limits, where I offer a combination of empathy (e.g “I see you’re not happy with this”), a clear verbal limit (e.g. “I can’t let you hit/kick me”) and a physical limit to stop … Continue reading Using play to respond to my son’s aggression